Oh my violated Facebook and Myspace

And my violated Myspace friends.
Today at a family gathering I left my laptop alone for ten minutes. I cam back to find my friend Robert slamming it shut, trying to hold back a laugh.
I pushed him out of the way and immediately scanned my two tabs that I had left open, one for my facebook and one for my myspace.

Facebook:
He had changed my relationship status from "single" to "open relationship"
WHY is that status there!? that's disgusting!?
and he'd posted three statuses

1.we had been watching classic boxing matches and the Bowe-Holyfield match with the surprise parachute landing was on. Robert apparently thought it was a live match and posted the parachute news as a status.

2.He posted that he understood old school boxing better than new school

3.He posted "sex sex sex sex"
this was actually amusing because a couple of people thought that this was just me being me.

Myspace:
OMG! I did so much damage control here.
Not only did he post the same boxing bulletin, but posted MULTIPLE bulletins detailing sex positions and advertising my "services"
He then engaged in various chats with some of my friends! Now everyone knows that I have a strict "do not use the useless chat bar on myspace to talk to me" rule, so it wasn't hard convincing people that it wasn't me. Thankfully he was smart enough not to insult anyone. He smack-talked Twilight, which was another give-away that it DEFINITELY wasn't me.

After all my damgae control and apologies, i turned to him.
He stood there, nearly doubled over in laughter

(I keep replaying the following in my head, because it was, for lack of a better word, badass)

I very calmly asked him to stop, stand up and face me. He stopped and stood straight still trying to hold back from giggling. It was a short kick but it was effective. I very swiftly gave him a foot in the nuts, and he doubled over.
Then I said:
"Now you can laugh"

I'm very over it, we're still friends, but I doubt he'll let me near his crotch ever again.
It was a prank, and I'll give him kudos because he did alot in 10 minutes. And almost no one noticed.
No harm, no foul, just don't get into my sites ever again